Grief and all of its manifestations are part of the human design. Grief is very important and has the capability to uplift us, change us, and yes, unite us. When you go through your own individual grief process and when you come to the point where you can move on easefully in your life, you may not recognize that you are an inspiration to others in their own lives. This has been my experience, and I’d like you to know that your inner journey has an effect on others in your community. In my work, I provided bereavement support to newly widowed spouses. I would be uplifted by their courage. I would be intrigued by their search for meaning. I would be inspired by their ability to just put one foot in front of the other and live their lives.
The aloneness of grief makes grief hard. Even if you are in the same family, each of you will grieve differently. You are alone because you are unique. Yet, at the same time, you are not alone because we are all together.
Many years ago, after my mother died, I wasn’t sure how I would make it. I remember driving down the street and noticing people in their cars and walking on the sidewalks. Many of them looked like they were of the age that probably their mothers had died, but they were driving along, walking along, and participating in life. If they could do it, I would, too. I had no idea who they were, but they inspired me to turn the corner and move through life with a little more cheerfulness and lightheartedness.
None of those people knew I was watching them and noticing them. In that very alone moment for me, we were all together. May it be so for you!
(page 189, Harnessing the Power of Grief)